About a decade or so ago, buyer’s agents began convincing their buyers to write a letter to seller to be included with their offer. Often those letters told the seller how much the buyer and the family loved the house, and often included not only personal information but photos of the family including the pets. The hope was that the seller would consider the offer when in a competing market, or if/when the buyer wanted to offer a lower price and ask the seller for concessions, certain appliances, or some personal property such as furniture, draperies and other items.

All seemed all well and fine, until it started becoming apparent that the seller was looking at the letters from a different perspective.

First, real estate transactions often include some intense negotiations, including the guessing game of one party trying to determine what the other party is thinking. In this case, a seller must wonder how much the buyer really wants the property, and how much are they willing to pay and give up asking for something. That guessing game is the leverage many clients recognize.

 However, with these letters, it became apparent to the seller that the buyer would often pay top dollar and give up concessions and more, since the letter said that the kids already picked out their bedrooms. Why should a seller drop their price or offer more concessions, when the buyer has pretty much indicated that they will buy this house at almost any reasonable price and terms. Thus, the concept of negotiation is off the table.

 The second, and even more disturbing fact is when the seller uses the information provided to discriminate against a buyer. Case in point, a family in Virginia provided the letter and photos of the family. Those photos revealed the parents of different colors, mixed-race kids, and some other adopted kids of a different ethnicity. The seller rejected their offer, clearly on racial grounds. The buyer’s agent picked up on this, and the buyers filed a fair housing complaint against the seller and the listing agent.

 And, as a good measure, they filed complaints against their agent, who convinced them to write and provide the letter.

As a result, NAR has taken the position that these “love letters” are a bad idea, and strongly recommend not doing them, for any transaction. Here is a link to one of many articles on NAR regarding these letters:

https://www.nar.realtor/fair-housing-corner/love-letters-or-liability-letters

Result, no need to give up negotiation ability, nor give a seller a clear path to discrimination. While that discrimination could occur without the letter, it is advisable not to add fuel to the fire, ending in disappointment for the buyer and possible liability for you, your broker and the company.